Anyone reading this right now knows we are in the middle of the global pandemic sh!tshow known as the coronavirus. We’re all confused and scared. But - HOLY HELL - I am terrified. So I was especially surprised when, while talking with a girlfriend yesterday (on the phone – social distancing, people!), she said:
“If this turns out to be the zombie apocalypse, you’re the person I want on my team.” Huh? Surely she couldn’t be referring to me, the *least* outdoorsy of all city-loving folk. “Not because you hunt or anything,” she said. “But because nothing ever phases you. The world could be ending, and you would calmly direct everyone where to go, what to do, and which shoes to pack.” I laughed, of course, at the thought of me in my designer heels and sunglasses, fighting off the undead. But, as I reflected on my friend’s statement, I started to understand what she meant. I might not be an amazing hunter-gatherer, but I am a world-class compartmentalizer. According to Wikipedia, “Compartmentalization is a subconscious psychological defense mechanism used to avoid cognitive dissonance, or the mental discomfort and anxiety caused by a person's having conflicting values, cognitions, emotions, beliefs, etc. within themselves.” Yep, I rock at compartmentalizing. Whether it’s from years of working in law enforcement in Los Angeles’s Skid Row, seeing the worst of the worst: gnarly dead bodies, extreme abuse, humanity at its absolute lowest, or from the rough road I’ve walked in my personal life, nothing phases me. More accurately, this pandemic stuff phases the hell out of me; I’m just really adept at staying calm, cool, and collected, no matter what. You might be saying to yourself, “Yeah, yeah, zombies, compartmentalizing . . . what does this mean for me?” Well, I wasn’t born this way. And through the years, I’ve gained enough perspective and wisdom to understand how I developed these skills. Call it what you will: Compartmentalizing. Keeping a cool head. Resilience. I’ve got this down. And I think I’ve developed a way to teach these skills to others. I mean, who doesn’t need some serious resilience right about now? Bring on the zombies. Follow along. I’ve got you.
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One important step in the roadmap to resilience is maintaining a strong support system of friends and loved ones. The current environment of social distancing and quarantines presents unique challenges when it comes to connecting with others. Here are a few ways our family has found to bridge the gap with those outside our home:
1. Checking in frequently via text. Whether or not you’re normally a big texter (I’m not), now is a great time to use this tool to stay in touch. Even a quick, “How are you doing today?” can be a lifesaver for a friend who’s struggling. 2. Using Facebook or another social media app. I prefer Facebook for a few reasons: (1) It’s super easy to share photos and videos, along with text. (2) Its Messenger feature is a great way to message a group of friends. (Better than text for groups, IMO, because I tend to get annoyed when my phone is constantly pinging every time someone replies to the group.) Facebook Messenger allows you to simply turn off notifications for a set period of time (for example, while you’re working or trying to homeschool), yet still access the messages at your leisure. (3) The Messenger Kids app is fantastic. It has strict parental controls, and allows kids to connect with friends via traditional text or live video chat. 3. Zoom “virtual happy hours.” Zoom is a free app that allows for group videos. Prior to the coronavirus, the app was largely used by businesses for remote video conferencing. In recent weeks, however, many have discovered that Zoom is a fantastic way to get together with a group of friends for a virtual happy hour or dinner. Give it a try and let me know what you think! 4. Humor Lets face it: All of this uncertainty and disruption is scary. And humor is a wonderful tension reliever. A funny meme or inside joke with friends can help turn someone’s mood around. 5. Snail mail. Kids love to send and receve letters, but keeping in touch the “old-timey” way can be super gratifying for adults, too. 6. Neighborhood Games Most of us have seen sweet chalk drawings popping up around our neighborhoods. Did you know the hearts are messages of love and support, a way for neighbors to show solidarity during these uncertain and isolating times? Pick a nice day, head out to your driveway or sidewalk, and draw a heart or write an uplifting note. You just might make someone’s day. |
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